Priority Boarding = 1 Level Under God

I have a favorite blogger -- her blog is titled "People I Want to Punch in the Throat"
She is FUNNY.  Seriously funny.


Anyway let's pretend that she asked me to be a guest blogger.  HA!  And now I'm going to talk about someone I would like to punch in the throat.

I'm going on one of my many airplane "rides" of 2012 (aka business travel)....and I'm shocked how boarding classes have turned us in to Elitist Assholes.  Too harsh?  Well listen to my story before you judge.

I'll set the stage:

• Typical larger-than-any-other-airport in the US crowds
• Boeing 757  3 & 3 60 some rows
• East to West Coast Non-stop 6 hour flight
• Overbooked by 5 oh wait 6 oh wait 7 (we need  7 volunteers to stick around until the next flight that may or may not happen...ya right.)  Gripping my boarding pass intensely

So the gate agent requests that only people who need extra time or who are traveling with small children board.  So apparently that is secret code for:   men in business suits line up!  

Gate agent calls for First Class.  Proudly, the first class Platinum travelers stick their noses up at us like they have somehow joined an elite secret society and are better than us because they get to BOARD FIRST and have a WIDER SEAT.  (Hey the joke's on you buddy -- only 10% PAY for first class -- the rest are upgraded free -- so let's just call it what is is - LUCKY)

Then they call for "Priority Lane" Boarders -- Diamond and Gold members and Skyteam elite.   After about 15 minutes -- and some woman searching for her boarding pass in line -- they call Zone 1.   I didn't know this was the other 500 passengers on the manifest....I was coded Zone 1, I am a medallion member.  I thought that I *might* board the plane before SOMEONE.  Nope -- not happening.  So I politely merge with the line.

The most alarming thing?  This man behind me -- this suit - screams out -- HEY YOU HAVEN'T FINISHED BOARDING PRIORITY!!!! at the gate agent.  Really dude?  You're going to look like a MAJOR ASSHAT in front of hundreds of people just to board a plane?    I wanted to punch him in the throat.

So rather than get arrested, I decided to REALLY annoy him -- I let a bunch of people in front of me.